Quarreling about words (2Timothy 2:1-26)

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I have been learning lately that my mind is something of an enigma.  I mean, I like to think about words and when people say them, what they mean.  How I interpret them and especially what they mean to me. 

I am married and things have fallen quite a bit lately and our relationship has really been bad.  We have gone through quite a bit in the last few years.  Words have been exchanged and things have been battled in my mind about those words.  I have thought and thought and even evaluated everything that has been said.

So, here I am today, reading God's Word in 2 Timothy.  Paul tells us to "endure hardship like a good soldier of Christ." (2Timothy 2:3)  I say, "why yes Lord, I can do that." Then I turn and think, did I really endure all those words of anger from my wife?  How did I do it?  Was I lashing out with words of ugliness in return?  What did I do to help change the situation? 

Paul also goes on to say that a good soldier "wants to please his commanding officer." (2Timothy 2:4)  OK, God is my commanding officer and I want to please Him.  I want to do what God would want. 

Paul even goes on to say that, Timothy is to "warn [others]…about quarreling about words…[and that] it is of no value, and only ruins those who listen."  (2Timothy 2:14)  This makes me think about my kids.  I mean, I evaluate the words my wife has spoken and even say that she is rude and cruel.  I tell her that the words she is using cuts to the heart and we "quarel" about those words.  She says that she didn't mean that by what she said.  But I insist that she has to understand that what she says does have meaning to those that hear them. 

OK, so I know Paul is talking to Timothy about those who step in and talk about the Gospel and disrupt the meaning of what God has as the truth.  I know what Paul is trying to tell Timothy here in chapter two.  But I am struggling.  Does anyone else struggle with those who say things that create hardship and even anger in others by what they say? 

OK, so in my life I need to do what Paul is already saying to us and what God is trying to get across to me.  I am to not "have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because…[I] know they produce quarrels.  And the ord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone…" (2Timothy 2:23)  Here I am to be kind to my wife.

This indeed is my application to this passage.  I can break down what Paul is saying to Timothy and the reasons why, but God is speaking to my heart, and perhaps speaking to your heart about words.  Some say that if you don't got anything good to say, don't say anything at all.  I agree, and I am trying to do that. 

If you are struggling with your words, like I do with my wife, by evaluating and critiquing everything.  I suggest we try to implement what Paul is saying here to avoid pulling others away from Christ.  Stop it!  But we must in the event of serious error about God, "gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant then repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth…and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." (2Timothy 2:25-26).

I can't share here exactly what I struggle with, but it should suffice to say that I struggle within my relationship like many others do in regards to what others say.  It can hurt and hurt so deeply that it fractures the relationship.  Pray today that we can shut our mouths from the hurtful things we can say and say those things that are loving and caring.  Stop myself from lashing out back to my wife who says hurtful things.

Whatever you struggle with in regards to words, pray that God :grant us the wisdom to be "quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's [man or woman] does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." (James 2:19-20)  Be careful what we say because "with the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness.  Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing.  My brothers, this should not be." (James 3:9-10)  Yes, let us use out tongues for good not evil. 

Let us ask God for strength today but "when you [me and you] ask…” don’t ask with “wrong motives, that [we]…may spend what…[we] get on…[our] pleasures." (James 4:3)

About Ernest Grogg

First and foremost I am married to Olesya and looking forward to the rest of our lives together. Marriage is a journey and it is interesting and fun. Saved at the age of 25 and while salvation has been a challenge, God has always been faithful.

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